Chattin' with Santa
Me: Hey Santa.
Santa: Hey Lee.
Me: So, will this be the year you finally stop by my house and give me presents?
Santa: Nope, I don't believe I will.
Me: Why's that?
Santa: Because you don't believe in Jesus.
Me: That's a technicality! Certainly you drop off presents at people's homes who don't believe in Jesus.
Santa: Not true! I only drop off presents to people who believe. And if they don't, I kill them!
Me: WHAT?!
Santa: Yep! Off with their heads! Ho ho ho!
Me: That seems harsh.
Santa: Not compared to the Crusades.
Me: Damn, Santa. Do you think people are lying to you in order to get gifts?
Santa: Probably.
Me: Yeah, I'd lie to get that new Drake album. It's pretty good.
Santa: It sure is.
Me: You know he's Jewish, right?
Santa: No way.
Me: For real.
Santa: Crazy.
Me: I know.
Santa: Alright Lee, I better be going. Merry Christmas!
Me: Merry Christmas, Santa!
