2012 is off to a great start
So I woke up in the drunk tank this morning.
Here’s what I remember from last night’s party: I cracked open a beer and started requesting all the Justin Bieber songs I knew to the DJ. I also remember being super popular at the party, per usual. “How do you know so many Bieber songs off the top of your head, Lee?” all the hottest girls at the party asked me. “I don’t know, ladies. Now get me a beer!” I said to all 50 of them. I felt bad for their dates because they were so into me and my vast Bieber knowledge. I was like a veritable Bieberpedia over there!
Cut to this morning.
I wake up in a super not-comfy jail cell next to an obese dude who told me, “I’m going to fuck the pretty out of you.” Is that even possible? Whatever, it was one crazy night, and I hope that if we make it to 2013, I get to do it all over again!!!
