A snippet of conversation from a date I went on last night
Me: Tell me about yourself.
Her: Well, I'm a single mom.
Me: Oh. Really? You didn't mention that earlier.
Her: Yeah, didn't think it was that important.
Me: You didn't think the fact that you have a kid was important to mention?
Her: Two.
Me: Oh.
Her: Yeah, whatever. I don't see them very often.
Me: That's too bad. They're staying with their dad?
Her: No, they're with me. I just don't like spending time with them. I spend a lot of money on babysitters.
Me: I get that. Well, I'm flattered you got them one for our date tonight!
Her: Actually, they're waiting for me in the bathroom.
Little girl walks up to me.
Her: That's one of mine. (to girl) GET BACK IN THE BATHROOM!
Little Girl: I'm hungry. Are you my dad?
Me: No. Take some bread from our table, honey.
Her (slaps bread out of girl's hand): Remember baby, bread's for fatties.
Me: Umm...
Her: She's on a cleanse.
Little Girl: I'm always hungry.
Me: I gotta go.
