| SCENE: |
12:01am, Valentine's Day
|
| Me: |
Baby, I got you a gift.
|
| Her: |
Aww, honey.
|
| Me: |
Cool. I didn't have time to wrap it.
|
| Her: |
I don't care about that.
|
| I hand her a home AIDS test.
|
| Her: |
What the fuck is this?
|
| Me: |
You know, so you can test yourself. For AIDS.
|
| Her: |
This isn't funny. Are you trying to be funny?
|
| Me: |
I'm trying to be practical. Ok, I thought you might not like something so practical, so I also got you something romantic: the Dave Matthews Band album Some Devil from 2003.
|
| Her: |
I think I'd rather test positive than listen to that shit.
|
| Me: |
You're not in a very loving mood right now. |
